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: twilight : by KarolinaNoumenon : twilight : by KarolinaNoumenon
The best part is... it's not a comedy, this book is dead serious XD

I'm not even trying to make the characters look stupid, thats how they really are.

Bella: The main character - no personality or... anything for that matter. She's just kinda there.

Edward: The vampire who makes sparkly rainbows with his skin. Also no personality.

Jacob: Sadly... -sighs- actually my favorite character. The only one with charm, mild personality but VERY bad taste in women.(if even that....) He also has extreme body heat, hence the egg frying on his shoulder...

I can go on for hours an how terrible the book is. And how terrible the characters are. But i'll restrain myself for now.

And if any hardcore fans come across this...


YES i have read the books. I'm on my way on reading Breaking The Dawn, and judging by the spoilers i've read, it's going to be even more ridicilous than the previous books. Oh man i can't wait <3

It's hard to admit it, but this stupid series has a way of brainwashing you. Like... i enjoy reading it, untill i start thinking. Soo... in order to truly understand this book, you need to think outside the box. If i didn't think about it, i would actually like the series. Which... is a scary thought. >_<;

Anyway... here is a quick drawing for you <3 I know most of you will enjoy this ^^

Characters are belong to Stephenie Meyer
image (c) to me.
Add a Comment:
 
:iconcoffeeforlife383:
coffeeforlife383 Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
i know right! twilight is a guilty pleasure for me. Bella and Edward so the personalities of wood. and i felt a bit bad for Jacob. always getting the short end of the stick. lol :)
Reply
:iconravenwing1721:
ravenwing1721 Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2016
Im reading the book and i just realized
Charlie is team JACOB😂😂
Reply
:iconskepticalcynical:
SkepticalCynical Featured By Owner Aug 28, 2016
"Team Edward or team Jacob?"




Team Peeta.
Reply
:iconthe-forgoten-nobody:
The-Forgoten-Nobody Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2016
TEAM EDWARD DUH!!!!!! ARE U THE STUPIDS ✨😶
Reply
:iconskepticalcynical:
SkepticalCynical Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2016
Team I don't care about sparkly fairy vampires! :D
Reply
:iconthe-forgoten-nobody:
The-Forgoten-Nobody Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2016
HA HA HA VERY FUNNY BUT EDWARD IS HOT
Reply
:iconskepticalcynical:
SkepticalCynical Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2016
Not to me. It's your opinion mate
Reply
:iconfoxhunk:
FoxHunk Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2016
Im in love with the eggman XDDDDDDDDD
Very interesting way to summary this piece of shit. Thanks for the laugh.
Reply
:iconcommandaspyder:
CommandaSpyder Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2015  Student General Artist
A perfect explanation and summary of how stupid this series is lol XD
Reply
:iconlittle-wolf-fang:
Little-Wolf-Fang Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2015
If I was the author of Twilight,I would have done it way better

I am writing a vampire story,full of action,adventure,horror,sacrifice,and love,all different kinds of love
Reply
:iconchickaablet:
chickaablet Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2015
Plus, Edward is abusive to Bella. Every girl says "I wish my boyfriend/ had a boyfriend like Edward" and I'm like "Really? You want an abusive, stalker for a boyfriend?"
Reply
:iconvarjomo:
Varjomo Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
"It's hard to admit it, but this stupid series has a way of brainwashing you. Like... i enjoy reading it, untill i start thinking. Soo... in order to truly understand this book, you need to think outside the box. If i didn't think about it, i would actually like the series. Which... is a scary thought. >_<;"

That's exactly how I feel about the series. Llama Emoji-38 (Confused) [V2] Although I just couldn't read but only 2 first books. And the movies,,,, :projectilevomit: I just,,, It took all my mindpower to watch the first one all the way. Ugh,,,Puke 
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:iconpyramidhead90:
PyramidHead90 Featured By Owner Feb 6, 2015
Okay, i'm calling "Get the fuck out" on this.

Bella never smiled.  In fact i'm fairly certain she's a sociopath and largely incapable of genuine attachment or emotion.
Reply
:iconstar-von-alicorn:
Star-Von-Alicorn Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
XDD
Reply
:iconljsraksha:
ljsraksha Featured By Owner Aug 30, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Wow, I'm only in the middle of the second book but, I hate this book with a passion. Every word you have said about it and it's characters are true.
I also...sadly...like Jacob...
Reply
:iconrannja:
Rannja Featured By Owner Nov 11, 2013
so cool, the egg on his shoulder :D
Reply
:iconraritwirules15:
RariTwirules15 Featured By Owner Oct 19, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
I hate Twilight with a burning passion, but this drawing is so epic! XD Bella's shirt makes me laugh!
Reply
:iconnidokingfan:
Nidokingfan Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2013  Student Writer
Totally true ^^
Reply
:iconfruitsofharvest:
FruitsOfHarvest Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2013  Student General Artist
But dun say that Twilite is lyke ttly the best thing EVEEERRR!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!one!!!!!!

That is my reason I hate it. :iconnotimpressedplz:
Reply
:iconlovablexinu:
lovableXinu Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013
hahaha this is so right and i hate tilight u think the vampires r gay or they wouldn't sparkle the wolf is ok and bella is a moron.

Reply
:iconannika-san:
Annika-san Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Student Writer
That was RUDE I LOVE JACOB!!!!!!!!!!!!
JK Funny
that man is attractively smexy
Reply
:iconienzo628:
ienzo628 Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Bella does have personality. She's manipulating and gives emo's like myself a bad name. All she does and bitch, sorta puts her life on the line and expects others to save her ass, because she thinks her life sucks. She disrespects her parents. Her father she sees as a nerd and her mom, she can't stand her mom's boyfriend, even though her mom's boyfriend tries to be a good father to her.

Edward Cullen, he's a stalker and at first he wanted nothing to do with Bella. But, she keeps pressuring him till he goes out with her. She's happy, because she gets the 'hottest' guy in the school. She thinks that just because Edward looks seventeen when she turns eighteen that she's a pedophile, even though it's the other way around as Edward as lived since the beginning of the 20th century. Edward stalks her, looks at her wierdly and just because she tries to kill herself he goes back to her.

Jacob Black, he always has his shirt off and always defends Bella, even though she only uses him to get back with Edward. He gets called a monster, because Bella thinks he's killing people in New Moon, when it's the antagonist from the first movie. Yet, when Edward kills people, it's nothing. Edward also wants Bella to get rid of their unborn daughter, because it's causing her pain. She doesn't want to and they apparently they don't think that vampires and humans can even interbreed and they think that a Hispanic folklorist has all the answers. You're right I can go on with this. How can people be into this? Even if the author complains like a little brat when people criticize her work.
Reply
:iconcommandaspyder:
CommandaSpyder Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2015  Student General Artist
Lol, I know right? This franchise has ruined the reputation of vampires, I could go on aswell, but I can't be fucked lol. :notimpressed: Cutie Thumbs Down 
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:iconienzo628:
ienzo628 Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2015  Student Traditional Artist
Well, the franchise is over.
Reply
:iconcommandaspyder:
CommandaSpyder Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2015  Student General Artist
Thank fucking god lol
Reply
:iconienzo628:
ienzo628 Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2015  Student Traditional Artist
Yep
Reply
:iconienzo628:
ienzo628 Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2015  Student Traditional Artist
Yep.
Reply
:iconcliffiffifordio:
Cliffiffifordio Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Lol
Reply
:iconfruitbat2011:
FruitBat2011 Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2013
Heh.

I actually was toying with the idea of writing a parody of Twilight, until I realized I'd actually have to read it. I got five chapters in before I couldn't take any more.
Reply
:iconhottspinner:
Hottspinner Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
There actually is one :) published an everything! lol
Reply
:iconcliffiffifordio:
Cliffiffifordio Featured By Owner Jan 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This would make a way better movie.
Reply
:iconwiwlm:
WiWLM Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
...I LOVE Edward's face! :D:D ...Looks so... :iconheythereprettyplz:
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:iconaskjacobblack:
AskJacobBlack Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2012
look at dat sexy face :iconsuggestiveusuiplz:
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:iconharleyquinnsfunhouse:
harleyquinnsfunhouse Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
bella looks happy!?
Reply
:iconjustarandomidiot:
JustARandomIdiot Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
I LOVE YOU
I completely agree with you. Most accurate description ever.
Reply
:iconfriendofdragons:
Friendofdragons Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
I remember when I was about twelve and was dying to read those books because I loved vampires and I thought they sounded so good :P. And then when I finally got to read them, I liked them...until, like you said, I started using my brain for once. Of course, it took me four books to do that (ok, I lied, three. I bought the last one 'cause I was curious *hides face in shame*) To my own credit, I always knew that Bella and Edward's relationship was absurd. I liked Jacob too; at least he was Bella's friend, not just some dude she falls in love with because he's a jerk to her. YEARS later I realize that the books aren't even well-written to begin with. How on earth could I have ever liked them in the first place? :no:

That's my tragic tale.

Oh, and it made me hate vampires too.
Reply
:iconfruitbat2011:
FruitBat2011 Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2013
Don't give up on vampires yet. There's a reason they're classic monsters.

Try reading Bram Stoker. Dracula's a hell of a lot better written than anything Stephanie Meyer's done. Or if you want something more modern, try Interview With a Vampire, but not the movie. Anne Rice can't write film dialogue worth a damn, but her books are good.
Reply
:iconfriendofdragons:
Friendofdragons Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2013
Oh, of course I love Dracula. But that's because he's properly creepy, and most importantly, evil. I only like vampires that are either pure, indiscriminate predators --I could go into a long, slightly feminist rant about how vampires are practically rapists, but you probably don't want to hear that--(as in 30 Days of Night or Justin Cronin's The Passage) or are evil and must be killed (e.g. Dracula, Ted Dekker's Immanuel's Veins). None of this vampire "romance" crap.
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:iconfruitbat2011:
FruitBat2011 Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013
Oh, I agree wholeheartedly. Dracula & Co are creepy and evil in the way vampires are supposed to be, and Edward Cullen...sparkles.

Or, to paraphrase Dean Winchester, he's not a vampire, he's a douchebag.

BTW, I've never read anything by Ted Dekker. Is he any good?
Reply
:iconfriendofdragons:
Friendofdragons Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013
Ted Dekker is awesome! :D I'm a big fan of his books.

He writes a lot of fantasy, mystery, and thriller. I'm more partial to his fantasy: his Books of Mortals, Circle, Paradise series are my favorites. You should definitely check them out if you like that kind of stuff.

And if you like super-cool, entirely evil vampires, Immanuel's Veins is definitely for you!
Reply
:iconfruitbat2011:
FruitBat2011 Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013
I think I've seen his mysteries on the shelf at the library, but I've never checked them out. I may have to do that next time I go.
Reply
:iconsmeesh-love:
smeesh-love Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2012
ur so right, when you said "i enjoy reading it... until i start thinking about it". that's EXACTLY how I feel.
lol i love bella's shirt
Reply
:iconichibankioshi:
ichibanKioshi Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I read all books and this is
SO TRUE :D
Reply
:iconbslhuaedow:
BSLHUAEDOW Featured By Owner Aug 30, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Ohmygodohmygod I can't stop laughing! The sad part is how true this is...I seriously love you for making this hahaha great pic :giggle: :rofl:
Reply
:iconsilvertidalwave:
SilverTidalWave Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2012  Student Writer
Yeah, I was sucked into Twilight for a while...and then one day I suddenly realised how bad it was and I have never picked it up since. XD

I really love this by the way, this should have been the cover of the book. XD
Reply
:iconsary101:
sary101 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2012  Professional Traditional Artist
lol the egg cooking on jacob. i always thought that the moment bella talked about him being his own sun. XD
Reply
:icononliafaze:
OnliaFaze Featured By Owner Jun 6, 2012
I myself was sucked into the stupidity of Twilight for a while. Fortunately I snapped back to reality. I have been sober for almost 3 years
Reply
:icondots3050:
dots3050 Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2012
LOL
Reply
:icononyxbasilisci:
OnyxBasilisci Featured By Owner Jun 1, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Jacob has no pants....and he's behind Edward........and Edward looks happy......XD
Reply
:iconspotwolfe:
Spotwolfe Featured By Owner May 26, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
OOH SHINY!

*forgets about subject
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